how to make a long distance relationship work

Do you want to know the secret on how to make a long-distance relationship work?

According to this long-distance relationship statistics, over 50% of all long-distance relationship result in a marriage, so if you are in a long-distance relationship and you are wondering how to make your LDR last, then you need to check out these best tips for making a long-distance relationship work as shared by a relationship expert.

14 Best Tips For Long-Distance Relationships

  1. Communicate, Communicate and Communicate
  2. Try to Mimic life as though living together
  3. Make it clear in your mind why you want the relationship
  4. Know you and your partner’s love language
  5. Remember to invest in your individual lives
  6. Develop a habit of openly sharing your thoughts
  7. Build emotional connectivity
  8. Set a reasonable time to meet up in person
  9. Share and connect on a deeper level by asking the right questions
  10. Dare to dream
  11. Create psychological proximity or closeness
  12. Avoiding assumptions
  13. Avoid Misunderstanding
  14. Set and manage expectations

Do Long-Distance Relationship Work?

Name: Amberly Hi Victoria

Website: https://www.aprioritizedmarriage.com

Couples in a long-distance relationship have a lot of extra challenges to keeping their relationship strong. If I were to give those couples one piece of advice to keep the connection between the two of them strong, it would be to communicate! There are so many ways in our modern-day to keep in touch when you are apart. You can send an old fashioned letter, write an e-mail, make a phone call, send a text, video chat, send picture messages, and even chat through a video/text app called Marco Polo. Because of all of the platforms available, you have no excuse for not communicating. Your situation might not allow you to communicate as often as you’d like, but do it as often as you can!

When you’re chatting with each other, allow time for the “business” conversations like bills to be paid, things going on with your kids and other adult tasks you tackle together. Also, talk about how you each are truly doing. Share your struggles and your successes and what you’re currently feeling, being aware that there probably isn’t a lot you can do to help each other at the moment, but you can be there to listen and sympathize. And then take time to connect on a personal level and deepen your relationship. There are a lot of great conversation starter resources out there for couples, to help keep the conversation light and moving in a direction that helps you get to know each other better. The more you talk, the easier it will be to communicate, and the more seamlessly you’ll shift back into normal life when you’re able to be together again.

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Name: LeslieBerth

Website: https://lovevictory.com/

Mimic life as though you were living together or nearby.:

1. Establish love rituals:

Good Morning /Good Night messages

Sexy Messages

Photos

2.  Discuss your day:

Work, Family, Friends

Disappointments, Frustrations

Health 

3. Schedule virtual  events:

Television shows

Concerts

Sports events

News

4. Plan live events:

Vacations

Work

Family celebrations

5. Discuss your future:

Living in the same city

Making sacrifices of work, family, and type of area.

Discussing doubts

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Name: Michaela Ray de Witters

Website: https://www.michaelaray.com/

Long-distance relationships, especially for a long period of time can be very challenging. You are in a committed relationship, while you have nobody to go out with, nobody to hug. It is kind of like being single except you can’t date anyone. After some time it can feel lonely and sad. For some relationships this is too much to handle, however, others can overcome it. So here are five tips on how you can make yours a success.

Invest in what you know, instead of a virtual dream

Do you know each other? Have you dated for at least 6 months before the long-distance?  Or have you just met at some event, felt a big sparkle? Relationships where you actually know each other are more likely to survive a temporary separation. You know what you are investing in and that increases the motivation. If you have only briefly met, you may accidentally spend months or longer investing in a “virtual dream”, meaning you imagine the person just like you want them to be, while in reality, they are nothing like that. Everybody seems perfect when they are far enough.

Make it clear in your mind, why do you want to keep the relationship

What is the value the relationship represents for you? What is special about this person you really appreciate and can’t get elsewhere? What will you gain and lose when you either stay together or break up? Will your life be better with or without this relationship? To make it fair, your partner should go through the same questions. Once you both determine that you are motivated, you are at a good starting point.

Set a specific time of the week to connect.

Dedicate a guaranteed time to each other, it shows both of you care. It helps you stay connected and creates space to discuss important things. Your meeting schedule is something concrete to count on during this unpredictable period. Give each other full attention during the calls.  Don’t try to multitask such as shopping, running. You can connect as often as desired but once a week is minimum to keep it alive.

Discuss openly how long is this going to take before you can be together

Is there a clear time when you can be together? Are you both working on making it happen? When you know you have to wait 3 more months it is doable, but when the end is not in sight motivation can fall.

Discuss who is willing to move to the location of the other

This may be complicated – a new country, new job, visa requirements, a new language, need to relocate or sell everything and buy new stuff like a car, furniture. Is it serious enough to support the one who moves? Are you both invested in making it happen or is only one of you falling madly in love, ready to leave everything while the other has doubts? Make sure you are equally invested to make it a success.

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Name: Stephanie Thoma

Website: http://stephaniethoma.com/

A tip for surviving a long-distance relationship is knowing your love language. According to the modern classic text “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman, we either give and receive love through physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service or gifts. If, for example, one of each of you thrives on words of affirmation, be sure to write one another love letters and voice messages. If gifts, you can surprise them with a surprise in the mail. If alternatively, your love language is physical touch or quality time, you may want to reconsider your willingness to engage in a long-distance relationship for a prolonged period of time.

Stephanie Thoma is the Author of Confident Introvert

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Name: Raffi Bilek

Website: https://www.baltimoretherapycenter.com/ 

In order to keep a long-distance relationship going, you need to make sure to invest in your individual lives as well. It can be easy to pour all your energy into your relationship and skimp on local friends and social activities. This approach is likely to leave you both feeling drained and not getting enough human connection. Moreover, if all your time goes into sustaining your romantic relationship, you may have little to talk about when you are in contact! Make sure to keep the other parts of your life going as well.

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Name: Laura Galinis,

Website: http://lauragalinis.com/

When it comes to surviving long-term relationships, communication is key. Talk about even the seemingly insignificant things and use this opportunity as a chance to build a strong foundation of being able to truly talk to one another. Develop the habit of openly sharing your thoughts and feelings with one another so that when you’re face to face again, you already have the pattern of open communication.

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Name: Fahim Lashkaria

Website: www.dontworrybehappy.co

A long-distance relationship’s survival is based on bonding between the LDR couple. Regular communication builds emotional connectivity. Each partner thinks of his/her partner in good and bad situations. Once this emotional connectivity is built, we know that he/she is the only one who can understand what your heart feels.

In a long-distance relationship, trust is what keeps us together. Emotional bonding will help you build trust.

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Name: Tina Kat Courtney

Website: http://www.afterlife.coach/

Because intimacy is the glue that keeps a bond united, it’s imperative that a long-distance duo take time to create intimacy in the manner that distance allows. This always happens through deep and vulnerable communication. Set aside a day/time each week where you hop on Zoom and share. Let one partner drive each week, asking intimate questions and revealing their own answers. This keeps a fresh, deeply connected bond going no matter how much physical distance there is between you.

The most important thing for survival is the efforts and ambitions both the partners make to be together in the future. A sincere effort is required from both and also the readiness to adjust their life required for being together in one place.

Last but not least is to set a reasonable time after which you meet up with each other regularly and in-person to strengthen the bond by satisfying each other’s physical needs. This is necessary for both the partners to save themselves from diverting their attention to others.

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Name: Tamara Pflug

Website: http://www.personal-development-zone.com/

Share and connect on a deeper level. You can do this by asking each other questions that will create an authentic and sincere conversation. I always say that people just want to be seen, heard, and understood. Listen to the other one’s answer and share your deepest thoughts. It will connect you to each other and you’ll just get more excited to be reunited again soon! 🙂 You may want to check out my post on questions to ask if you want anyone to fall in love with you

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Name: Laura Doyle

Website: https://lauradoyle.org/blog/laws-of-attraction-in-relationships/

If the goal of your long-distance relationship is to be together physically, then this is a magical method to make it so:  Just as you’re falling asleep, visualize your partner next to you in bed. Imagine how happy and connected you feel knowing that you’re physically together. Let the feelings wash over you as if it was actually happening.  Even if it doesn’t seem practical or possible to be together right now, watch as the universe rearranges itself to match your imagination.  You can check this link for more on the law of attraction in a relationship

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Name: Trey Cole

Website: http://www.quandarypeakcounseling.com/

Proximity in a relationship is extremely important in order to build and maintain connection; however, this doesn’t necessarily mean that one must be physically proximal. In cases of long-distance relationships, the hope is to create psychological proximity or closeness, which would include such things as progressively increasing vulnerability, creating time for interaction (i.e. phone calls, video chats, sending gifts/flowers, etc.), and doing things that communicate hope for the future of the relationship.

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Name: Jessica Speer

Website: http://www.jessicaspeer.com/

Avoiding assumptions is solid advice in any situation, but especially important in long-distance relationships. Since you do not see your partner often, it’s not possible to understand moods, unforeseen circumstances, or the daily curve balls that life throws at us. Distance makes it extra important not to ruminate or make up stories in your head about behaviors before you have a chance to speak to your partner about them. Refraining from making assumptions will eliminate a lot of heartaches and unnecessary stress in the relationship. 

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Name: Aishwarya Bharadia

Website: http://www.bonobology.com/

The key to surviving and thriving in a long-distance relationship is managing expectations and keeping open channels of communication. It is important to take out time from your routine for virtual dates, just as you would when meeting someone in person. Non-verbal cues can often be lost through video calling or audio calling and thus it is important to be more verbal and express your grievances more directly in order to avoid misunderstandings. 

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Name: Victoria Bill

Website: https://www.relationshiplovegems.com

Set and manage expectations

Conclusion:

There you have it. A list of the best tips for surviving a long-distance relationship. Now over to you: have you been in an LDR. How did you make it work?

Further Resources:

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