Do you want to learn how to stop thinking about someone you still love but who has moved on?
Here is the deal: Today I am going to show you exactly how you can stop thinking about someone especially if you have broken up with them.
You see for most of us, moving on after a relationship is hard.
And you can’t be blamed for it.
This is because when we first started the relationship, we gave it all our best.
But life happens.
For some, it is easier to move on after heartbreak while for some others, it is well a little bit difficult.
And that is why today, I am going to share with you tips that you can use to get over someone.
And these tips are backed by science.
That means they actually work if you practice them.
Are you ready to move on after heartbreak?
Then let’s dive in.
But first, why do we find it hard to move on after a breakup with someone we love
3 Reasons Why You Find It Hard to Move on After Heartbreak According to Science
16 Top Way to Stop Thinking About Someone You Loves That Works
1: Accept that the relationship is over
2: Pick up a new hobby
3: Resist The Urge To Stalk Them
4: Make it a daily challenge
5: Destroy those memories
6: Avoid having sex with them
7: Don’t allow any new interactions
8: Don’t allow for a come-back
9: Learn a new language
10: Allow yourself to love again
11: Remind yourself why you broke up in the first place
12: Don’t compare them with everyone you meet
13: Avoid emotional trauma
14: Appreciate yourself
15: Let time heal you
#1: Accept The Relationship Is Over
The first step to getting over someone you love is accepting that the relationship is over. A lot of times, in a bid to not deal with the pain, we tend to deny what has already happened. While accepting it will involve feeling the pain, it is better than being stuck in a position and not moving on. If you want to move on you will have to allow yourself accept that it has happened, feel the pain from the knowledge and heal.
#2: Pick Up A New Hobby
In many relationships, especially a long-term relationship, there is usually a kind of interdependency that happens between lovers. In certain cases, it is not shocking to find partners who are practically joined at the hip and do most things together. You can start moving on by picking up new hobbies that will not necessarily remind you of your partner and bring you around other people that will make you easily forget the other person. Spend time doing other things and being with people and your mind would not be idle enough to dwell on the person.
#3: Resist The Urge To Stalk Them
It is very normal to want to find out how if the person is doing as badly as you are so you can console yourself that you are not the only one suffering. While this is very understandable, it is not healthy – not if your plan is to move on. Don’t spend time bothering about what they are doing by stalking them on social media and through friends. Make a deliberate decision to let them go and not try to find out what is going on with them.
#4: It Is A Daily Challenge
One mistake many people making when getting over someone is setting unrealistic goals for themselves. You were with this person for a while and in that period of time; the person became a huge part of your life. Therefore, getting over the person will not be done overnight, it will take time, give it time. So, take it as a daily challenge and make it a daily reminder to tell yourself why it is important to move on from the person.
#5: Destroy Memories
If you want to successfully stop thinking about someone, it is important to destroy memories that you shared together, especially pictures and videos. You might also need to avoid some places you both frequent and even some mutual friends; if possible, till you are sure you are properly over them.
#6: Don’t Allow Any New Interaction
The person might reach out to you to talk maybe because they feel guilty or because they are deciding not to let you go. However, if you have decided what is good for you is to move on, and then it is important you avoid any further interaction, both virtually and physically. Feelings are still raw, so any communication at this point will affect your process of getting over the person.
#7: Avoid Sex With Them
You definitely want to avoid sex with them. That is the worst thing you can allow to happen with someone you are trying to get over. In fact, you shouldn’t even see them not to talk of thinking of having sex with them.
#8: Don’t Allow For a Come-Back
If you do not want to be a constant circle of and on and off the relationship, then you should definitely not encourage a come-back. Trust me, you will be tempted to start over the relationship again because, at that point, you will be considering how much pain you are in and would want to do practically anything to stop feeling the pain, including going back to a situation you shouldn’t be going back to. But you have to remain resolute not to allow a come-back.
#9: Learn A New Language
Immersing yourself in a new activity is good for getting over a person, so what better way to do that than to learn a new language? Learning a new language can be difficult and new, so it will definitely take up the time you would have spent thinking about the person.
#10: Allow Yourself To Love Again
A wise person once said, “Love is perfect but we are not perfect.” A lot of people fall into the error of misunderstanding human frailty for the inexistence of love. Some people become so jaded and cynical when they go through a tough relationship and claim love doesn’t exist or it is impossible. There are still many people out there who will show you the love you deserve, don’t give up on it when it comes. Give love a chance to help you forget the sad memories you had.
#11: Remind Yourself Why You Broke Up In The First Place
Whenever you are tempted to go back to the person or keep thinking about the person, remember why you broke up. If the relationship was made in heaven, there wouldn’t have been a need for a breakup in the first place. Now, it is very possible for people to break up so they can both grow or get a new perspective or even for the wrong reasons but if you are trying to forget the person and move on, most likely, the person has no place in your life.
#12: Don’t Compare Them With Everyone You Meet
As difficult as it might sound if you have had a bad experience, people are actually different. Everybody is not like the person, so don’t expect everybody to treat you as they did. You should also not compare everybody you encounter with them; allow people to show you who they are and not presume based on your former experience.
#13: Avoid Emotional Trauma
Don’t allow yourself to be sucked into emotional trauma or get depressed. It is not rare to find people who are sad or constantly ruminating on sad experiences become depressed. But this is not a given if you take time to deliberately avoid it. As much as you are bound to be sad about it, don’t let it consume you so you don’t fall into depression. Nobody is worth your mental health.
#14: Appreciate Yourself
It is expected that you might doubt yourself and start believing that you are a failure because the relationship did not work or maybe because the person made you feel guilty. However, you need to remember to appreciate yourself. You do not carry all the blame and you shouldn’t weigh yourself down with guilt. Appreciate yourself; hold your head high and move on to greater things.
#15: Let Time Heal You
Time heals all wound, so give time a chance to heal you. Don’t try to rush the process; take it one day at a time and allow yourself the time it will take to heal, so you can heal properly. Another mistake you shouldn’t make is jumping into another relationship immediately; make sure you are properly healed before you do.
If you are struggling with moving on after heartbreak, then this guide is the bible you need. However, you need to be patient as you time heals all wounds.